Friday, October 13, 2006

Oklahoma

Almost there. We busted out the miles today and were both exhausted by the time we reached the Flying J at Sayre. Went nearly 450 miles. Almost got in a fight but we cooled out and ate a good dinner of prime rib and all the comfort home cooking you can imagine. Pretty good. I also snuck out big hunks of the stuff to Hank and Lucky who snarfed them down and looked up at me with glowing eyes. J still doesn't know about the coat and I don't think I will tell her. She will look at me in that way that is a question mark as much as a look of disappointment. I still don't know why I accepted it. I don't need it. Perhaps it was a bit venal on my part, a reaction to somebody who would assume I am a homeless drifter just because I have a few paint stains on my pants. Strange. I tried it on in the mens room after they left and then took it off and carried it out to the van. I put it on top and got in and snuggled in next to J under the down comforter feeling an unshakable oddness and then the sick sweet smell of the guys cologne made me nauseus and I had to go back in and wash it off my arms. Wierd dreams haunted my sleep.

Not much to highlight except that radio is as mindless as TV. Why in the fuck do they keep playing the same loop from state to state. the mindless classic rock with the mindless DJ voice, the easy listening with its tinkle drip inane melodies and offensively inoffensive words. The religious bellicose idiots manhandling scripture, ripping Christ's body to pieces like cannibals and reassembling him to fit their frankenstein needs...Country, a bunch of models that have been trained to speak with a southern accent and whose voices are adjusted with the latest pitch correction technology...I would like just once to hear what Shania Twain would sound like without the pitch correction. And yes, I was told by a Nashville insider that she does use it. What a bunch of garbage and it is so utterly sad since there is so much good writing in the world, so much good music...

Earlier at dinner J and I had a lively discussion about the nature of capitalism and art that segued into a rant on my part about the development of a system of American royalty. In this system I pointed out, the wealthy, semi-wealthy and even barely wealthy are not satisfied with just having money and what it can buy. They want it to mean something. They want peasants. they want a structured class society that tells them their lives are meaningful and more important simply because they have wealth. They need consecration. And they will buy it. If they need a god and a religion to do this they will create one. Just like it developed in Europe. It seems to me to be a natural progression of capitalism gone rampant. Thus you can see it developing, in this country, with our actors and musicians as the acting royalty, they are being lauded as the American royalty and perhaps this is how it will develop into a full fledged monarchy. More on this as it develops in my thoughts...but the discussion was originally about the feeling J has that art can never flourish in a capitalistic society like ours because everything boils down to the bottom line. Thus, in some societies it can be an honorable thing to be poor but a scholar or artist but in ours you are reviled...This does seem to be the case. People fear deep thinking on any subject it seems...

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